Thursday, September 16, 2010
Good days and Bad days
So today was a good day. I slept in a little, went to a boring meeting for work, played some WoW, went to a LISGSA (library and information science graduate student association) get together, and hung out with friends playing an Egyptian board game and watching Penelope! Today I wasn't upset about anything, or frustrated about where I am in life. I had a good day. Yeah, that's about it. :) I guess it's just one day at a time.
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
To Begin With...
So, I guess I should give a little backstory...
I am 27 years old, and have been married for 5 1/2 years.
I had 2 miscarriages, during the first 6-8 weeks, within the first 3 years of our marriage. In 2008 I came back from an archaeology dig in Jordan and got pregnant right away. I made it to 12 weeks and then miscarried. I found out after that I have PCOS, and a pretty bad case of it. I was put on metformin as well because of my insulin resistance. We tried Clomid for 8 months, and I still didn't ovulate. After that we did a month of femara, and again no success. At this point I got into the MLIS program and moved to start that, taking a couple of months off of medications for my sanity. I started seeing a fertility specialist in October, and found out I have a genetic mutation that makes it so I can't absorb Folic Acid very well, and am supposed to take 3-4 times the normal amount in order to get enough. So at this point I was taking pre-natal vitamins, metformin 3 times/day, folic acid and Bvitamins.
I found out in the beginning of November that I had a cyst on my fallopian tube, and had to have surgery to remove it and they looked around to make sure there wasn't anything else wrong. They didn't find any reasons why I was miscarrying, so that was good.
My husband and I decided to try injectables and do and IUI, and it took awhile for my body to respond to the injectables, but once it did, it did! They almost didn't do the IUI because they were afraid that I may have had too many mature eggs. However, they were able to get it under control and did the IUI. I was really excited, and was hoping it worked, but it didn't. We spent almost $3000 dollars in one month on this, and it didn't work.
Ever since then I have been depressed and angry about everything. All I want is to be a mom, but we pretty much have one option left and that's IVF, which is at least $8000 unless I can find a study I can join.
I don't really know what is going on anymore. I have so much fear, hurt and anger in me that I don't know what to do right now.
So yeah, that's me in a nutshell and where I am in my life. I guess this will be the journey to where I'm going.
Right now I'm working on my MLIS and applying to start my PhD next fall.
I am 27 years old, and have been married for 5 1/2 years.
I had 2 miscarriages, during the first 6-8 weeks, within the first 3 years of our marriage. In 2008 I came back from an archaeology dig in Jordan and got pregnant right away. I made it to 12 weeks and then miscarried. I found out after that I have PCOS, and a pretty bad case of it. I was put on metformin as well because of my insulin resistance. We tried Clomid for 8 months, and I still didn't ovulate. After that we did a month of femara, and again no success. At this point I got into the MLIS program and moved to start that, taking a couple of months off of medications for my sanity. I started seeing a fertility specialist in October, and found out I have a genetic mutation that makes it so I can't absorb Folic Acid very well, and am supposed to take 3-4 times the normal amount in order to get enough. So at this point I was taking pre-natal vitamins, metformin 3 times/day, folic acid and Bvitamins.
I found out in the beginning of November that I had a cyst on my fallopian tube, and had to have surgery to remove it and they looked around to make sure there wasn't anything else wrong. They didn't find any reasons why I was miscarrying, so that was good.
My husband and I decided to try injectables and do and IUI, and it took awhile for my body to respond to the injectables, but once it did, it did! They almost didn't do the IUI because they were afraid that I may have had too many mature eggs. However, they were able to get it under control and did the IUI. I was really excited, and was hoping it worked, but it didn't. We spent almost $3000 dollars in one month on this, and it didn't work.
Ever since then I have been depressed and angry about everything. All I want is to be a mom, but we pretty much have one option left and that's IVF, which is at least $8000 unless I can find a study I can join.
I don't really know what is going on anymore. I have so much fear, hurt and anger in me that I don't know what to do right now.
So yeah, that's me in a nutshell and where I am in my life. I guess this will be the journey to where I'm going.
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